You are not me, Singapore;
do not pretend to know how to be more
than who you are, and your own history.
You should know that to see farther, and to lead
requires not just determination, and willpower, and energy
but rationality.
You, too, on occasion—
just like my best friend and all his fucked up intimations—
you, too, have often not wanted things to make sense
because if they do,
you fear that the frightful waves of guilt that will overwhelm you will be just too immense
and so,
the Void
where your Si-Fe critic and Si-Te gunslinger should be standing sentinel in defense
keeps growing larger.
How do I have no shame?
I understand that I haven't done anything wrong. I don't try to proclaim
my own goodness and enlightenment without basis. It would be profane
to deny people this.
I would become another Ozymandias.
And you,
country of my heart?
You worry that you would become
absolutely defenceless.
You are not an INTJ, Singapore.
You are an ISTP, wanting very much to be something more;
and you can be.
But you need to know that life here has to make sense first,
before any of us can understand the choices you made, and why they terrify you so badly
that all you see of the future is a frothing, gaping, screaming maw.
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